“Max is allowed everywhere. Wearing anything. This is the man who went to a royal wedding barefoot and in a sarong. An Alexander McQueen sarong, certainly, but a sarong all the same. This is some insane nonsense right here. Keep your cool, though, Max: don’t forget, the little people buy tickets.
“I’m meeting Henk van Veen,” says Max. Henk’s name will carry some weight here, Max is sure of it.
“Certainly, sir,” says the porter. “I believe Mr. Van Veen is waiting for you in the library. Wearing shoes.”
“Can I borrow some shoes?” Max asks.
“Certainly, Mr. Highfield. What size would you like?”
Max Highfield’s feet are a size six. “Ten, please.”
The porter disappears into a closet and returns with a pair of size ten brown brogues.
“Brown?” says Max. “But I’m wearing black.”
“They’re the only size tens I have, I’m afraid, sir,” says the porter. “I have a black in a nine if you think you could squeeze into them?”
“Even tens are tight,” says Max. “I’ll take the brown. But I need absolute assurance I won’t be photographed while I’m in the building.”
“Sir, this is The Wilberforce,” says the porter. “Within these walls you have more chance of being oil-painted than photographed.”” (Richard Osman, We Solve Murders)
Writing Exercise: Crafting Complex Characters Through Dialogue, Tone, and Implied Backstory
Techniques Illustrated by the Quotation
1. Characterization Through Dialogue: The excerpt reveals Max’s personality through his distinct speech patterns, confidence, and humor.
2. Balancing Tone and Humor: The passage uses a light, almost absurd tone to establish the atmosphere while maintaining the character’s dignity and relatability.
3. Implying Backstory Through Context: Without exposition, the text suggests Max’s eccentricity, privilege, and reputation, creating intrigue.
Writing Prompt:
Scenario:
Your character is attempting to gain access to an exclusive space (a private club, restricted gallery, or high-security area) while unprepared or inappropriately dressed. Write a 500-word scene in which your character navigates this situation through dialogue and interaction with a gatekeeper (e.g., a porter, receptionist, or guard).
Key Challenges to Address:
• Use dialogue to reveal your character’s personality, social status, and motivations.
• Establish a tone (humorous, tense, or ironic) that complements the situation and reflects the character’s mindset.
• Imply backstory and relationships without overtly explaining them, relying on context clues and subtle hints.
Evaluation Criteria
A strong response will:
• Feature dialogue that is natural, distinctive, and reveals nuanced aspects of the character.
• Effectively balance humor, tone, or tension to enhance the scene’s mood.
• Imply backstory and stakes through contextual details (e.g., gestures, small actions, or other characters’ reactions) without heavy-handed exposition.
• Maintain an economy of language—500 words should feel tight and purposeful.
A weak response might:
• Use overly expository dialogue that lacks subtext (e.g., “I’m rich, so I belong here”).
• Rely on clichés or generic interactions that fail to highlight character specificity.
• Lack a cohesive tone, with shifts that feel inconsistent or undermine the scene.
• Omit critical contextual hints that establish stakes or backstory.
Example Comparison:
• Weak:
• Porter: “You can’t come in wearing that!”
• Character: “I’ll have you know I’m a millionaire!”
• Porter: “Fine, but don’t touch anything!”
(This lacks subtext and feels flat and predictable.)
• Strong:
• Porter: “Sir, the dress code requires more than… athletic shorts.”
• Character: “These aren’t athletic shorts. They’re vintage Yves Saint Laurent.”
• Porter: “They’re polyester.”
• Character: “Oh, so you’re a fabric expert now?”
(This reveals both characters’ personalities and adds humor while implying tension.)
Follow-Up Workshop Questions
1. Does the dialogue feel natural and specific to the character, or does it fall into stereotypes?
2. How does the tone contribute to or detract from the scene’s mood?
3. What elements of backstory or stakes are implied? Are they clear and engaging?
4. Could any sentences be cut or tightened to enhance pacing and clarity?
Recommended Reading for Exemplary Techniques
Excerpt: “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams (the opening scene with Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect).
• This scene uses absurd humor and character-driven dialogue to establish tone, reveal character, and imply stakes. It’s an excellent model for balancing wit with substance.
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