“I do hope you’ll go out and see folks.” Her hand is still on mine, and she looks at me anxiously.
“No one wants to see me, Mom.”
“Sure they do. And I think it’s best if you don’t hide. You don’t have anything to be ashamed of, do you?”
It’s a genuine question, one that requires my response. Mom asks me constantly, in a million different ways, whether I murdered Savvy. Maybe she thinks that if she asks enough, I’ll eventually let it slip that I did indeed bash my friend’s brains in. I have to admire her persistence.
“No, I don’t have anything to be ashamed of,” I lie.
“That’s right, dear.” That’s what she always says when she thinks I’m lying.” (Amy Tintera, Listen for the Lie)
Character Development Writing Exercise: What You Don’t Say
Techniques Illustrated
Subtext through Dialogue: Emotional tension is layered beneath a seemingly ordinary exchange. Unreliable Narration: The narrator lies openly while claiming innocence, yet reveals self-awareness and potential guilt. Psychological Intrusion: The narrator exposes a character’s thoughts about another’s motivation, creating depth through internal observation.
Writing Prompt (500 words)
Write a scene in which a character is confronted by a close relative or friend about an event they may have been involved in—a secret that is socially or morally fraught. The scene must take place in a domestic setting (kitchen, living room, hospital waiting room) and feature only two characters. One must attempt to extract the truth; the other must deny it, though their internal monologue should betray cracks in their story. Use subtext in the dialogue, build tension through what’s unsaid, and reveal the character’s psychology through internal contradiction or suppressed memory.
Your goal is to create a situation where the reader is uncertain about the truth, but fascinated by the complexity of the lie. The conversation must have emotional stakes and end without resolution.
Evaluation Criteria
Successful responses will:
Layer meaning beneath the dialogue (e.g., evasive or overly sincere statements that suggest deeper truths) Establish internal contradiction in the POV character’s narration (a lie spoken aloud, a conflicting thought beneath) Ground the emotional tension in a believable relationship dynamic Sustain ambiguity—neither confirming nor fully denying guilt
Unsuccessful responses will:
Treat the conversation too literally, stating facts instead of revealing tension Fail to create psychological complexity in the narrator End with too neat a conclusion or clear answer about what “really happened” Lack a sense of pressure or emotional cost in the exchange
Examples
Weak:
“I didn’t do it,” I said.
She nodded. “Okay. I believe you.”
There was a long pause. We looked at each other.
No internal conflict. No subtext. Flat and declarative.
Strong:
“I didn’t do it,” I said.
She blinked slowly, the way she does when she doesn’t buy a word I’m selling.
“Of course not,” she said, placing the teacup exactly where the ring had already formed.
She doesn’t ask again. She doesn’t need to.
I stare at the cup, at the faint tremor in my hand. If I could go back to that night—
But there’s no undoing blood under your fingernails.
Subtle tension. Guilt implied but unconfirmed. Emotional texture under restraint.
Follow-Up Questions for Workshop/Revision
Where does the dialogue suggest something unspoken? Can you amplify the silence between lines? What’s the emotional payoff at the end? Could the character be more unsettled, or more determined? How can internal thoughts contradict what’s said aloud with more complexity? Are you trusting the reader to interpret, or over-explaining the character’s guilt or innocence?
Recommended Reading
“Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates
Masterful use of subtext, psychological tension, and unreliable surface interaction between characters.
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