“1. Never open a book with weather. If it’s only to create atmosphere, and not a character’s reaction to the weather, you don’t want to go on too long. The reader is apt to leaf ahead looking for people. There are exceptions. If you happen to be Barry Lopez, who has more ways to describe ice and snow than an Eskimo, you can do all the weather reporting you want.” (Elmore Leonard, Killshot)
Writing Exercise: Openings That Demand Attention
Quotation:
“Never open a book with weather. If it’s only to create atmosphere, and not a character’s reaction to the weather, you don’t want to go on too long. The reader is apt to leaf ahead looking for people. There are exceptions. If you happen to be Barry Lopez, who has more ways to describe ice and snow than an Eskimo, you can do all the weather reporting you want.” —Elmore Leonard, Killshot
Techniques Illustrated by the Quotation:
Character-Driven Openings – The beginning must introduce human stakes, not just external conditions. Readers engage with people, not scenery. Narrative Momentum from Line One – The opening must pull the reader forward. Indulgent setup or scene painting deflates tension. Voice and Precision Over Atmosphere for Its Own Sake – If you’re not Lopez, lean on specificity of character and situation, not lush but empty prose.
Writing Prompt (500 words):
Open a story in the middle of an action or moment of tension that involves a character making a choice. The setting can be rich, the atmosphere can be strange, but it must all funnel through what the character wants or fears in that instant. No weather reports, no descriptive throat-clearing. Begin where the story begins: in the body and mind of a person in motion or dilemma.
Start with a sentence that demands the reader’s attention by implying stakes, urgency, or contradiction. Something is happening, and it matters now. You can hint at setting, but only insofar as it shapes or heightens the character’s internal or external conflict.
Strong example opening:
“Clara was already halfway through the eulogy when she realized the man in the coffin wasn’t her uncle.”
Weak example opening:
“The church was quiet and still, filled with white lilies and the soft murmur of air vents. Outside, the sun glinted off rain-slick stones.”
Evaluation Criteria:
First sentence creates tension, surprise, or emotional momentum. A character is present and in motion—physically, emotionally, or psychologically. Setting and description are subordinated to character and stakes. The opening raises a question the reader wants answered. Voice is immediate, specific, and controlled.
Follow-Up Workshopping/Revision Questions:
What’s the conflict or contradiction embedded in your first sentence? How long does it take before the reader meets a character? Can that be shortened? Does the opening raise a narrative question or just paint a picture? Can you cut the first paragraph and start with the second? Does that improve it?
Recommended Reading:
First paragraph of “The Harvest” by Amy Hempel. The story opens with “The year I began to say vahz instead of vase, a man I barely knew nearly accidentally killed me.” It exemplifies immediacy, character-in-situation, and a line that makes the reader want to know everything that follows.
Timing Breakdown (2-hour session):
30 minutes: Brainstorm five different opening lines. Choose the one with the strongest character tension. 60 minutes: Write a 500-word scene that begins with that line and carries through the character’s response to their dilemma. 30 minutes: Self-edit using the evaluation criteria. Answer the workshopping questions in writing. Revise the opening paragraph twice.
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