“3. Never use a verb other than “said’’ to carry dialogue. The line of dialogue belongs to the character; the verb is the writer sticking his nose in. But said is far less intrusive than grumbled, gasped, cautioned, lied. I once noticed Mary McCarthy ending a line of dialogue with “she asseverated,’’ and had to stop reading to get the dictionary.” (Elmore Leonard, Killshot)

Making Dialogue Work: A Beginning Writer’s Guide

Based on Elmore Leonard’s principle of clear, uncluttered dialogue

Core Techniques Explored

1. Natural Speech Patterns: Learning to write dialogue that sounds like real people talking
2. Clear Character Voice: Making characters distinct through their word choices and speaking style

Writing Prompt (500 words)

Write a scene between two people (not three, as that can be overwhelming at first) having a conversation across a diner table. One character is trying to deliver difficult news to the other. Use only “said” for dialogue tags, or no tags when it’s clear who’s speaking.

Choose one of these situations:

• Breaking up with someone
• Quitting a job
• Confessing to breaking or losing something valuable
• Revealing a change in life plans (dropping out of school, moving away, etc.)

Requirements:

• Must include at least 10 exchanges between characters
• Must include some description of what characters are doing with their food/drinks
• Must show how both characters feel without using any dialogue verbs except “said”

Evaluation Criteria

Strong Responses Look Like This:

Sarah pushed her fries around the plate. "I've been thinking about next semester."

"Yeah?" Tom said. He kept his eyes on the menu he'd already memorized. "I'm not going back."

The menu dropped to the table. "What do you mean, not going back?"

Weaker Responses Look Like This:

"I've been thinking about next semester," Sarah nervously proclaimed.

"Yeah?" Tom questioned uncertainly.

"I'm not going back," Sarah announced sadly.

"What do you mean, not going back?" Tom demanded anxiously.

What Makes It Work

Strong responses:

• Use actions to show emotion (pushing fries around = nervousness)
• Let dialogue sound natural
• Show who’s speaking through action and context
• Include realistic pauses and reactions

Weak responses:

• Rely on fancy dialogue tags
• Tell us how characters feel instead of showing us
• Sound stiff or formal
• Overexplain emotions

Workshop Questions

1. Can you tell these characters apart by how they talk?
2. What do their actions tell us about how they’re feeling?
3. Where could you add small actions instead of dialogue tags?
4. What aren’t the characters saying that they might be thinking?
5. Does the dialogue sound like real people talking?

Example to Learn From

Read the first two pages of “Story of Your Life” by Ted Chiang. Notice how he writes dialogue that sounds natural while revealing character through word choice and small actions.

How to Use Your 2 Hours

• 15 minutes: Reading and understanding the assignment
• 15 minutes: Quick character sketches (write 3 facts about each person)
• 15 minutes: List what each character wants from this conversation
• 45 minutes: Write the scene
• 30 minutes: Read it out loud and revise

Helpful Tips

1. Before writing, say the dialogue out loud
2. Think about how you and your friends actually talk
3. Add actions between dialogue lines to show emotion
4. If you want to use a fancy dialogue tag, try showing that emotion through action instead
5. Remember: real people rarely speak in complete sentences

Practice Exercise Before Starting

Write three different ways a character could say “I don’t want to talk about it” without using any dialogue tags except “said.” Example:

• “I don’t want to talk about it,” she said, crumpling her napkin.
• “I don’t—just leave it alone, okay?” he said.
• She crossed her arms. “We’re done discussing this,” she said.

Regards,

RAR